Surrounded by Faith

I'm so grateful today! I went in for my ultrasound and I was extremely nervous. I'll be honest, the last few days have been tough. My brain has been on overdrive and I've been thinking so much about what's ahead. I also had some really crazy baby dreams last week. I even had one where the baby I delivered grew super fast and was like Benjamin Button in reverse!! It's been a little unnerving to say the least. I've also been thinking about the "what if's." What if I don't get pregnant? What if I do? What if I miscarry? What if, what if, what if. The "what if's" have consumed me. Well today I realized I don't need to worry about that. I'm focusing on the NOW, the PRESENT, this moment right here.

Today I went in for my ultrasound and I had one follicle measuring 27.5mm! This is very good news since I wasn't expecting to have any. What this means is I will go in tomorrow for my IUI. This is it! Round 2, here we come! I will take a pregnancy test on Christmas Eve and we will find out the answer. Either way, no matter what, without fail, GOD IS GOOD.

I also want to share something I've learned while going through this journey. As an outsider, I never understood what it was like to deal with infertility. I truly tried, but we became pregnant with Amelia Rose the very first month. I just couldn't understand the longing for a baby and the aching it leaves in your heart. What I've found is my friends, family and my faith in God are my support and my strength. They continually remind me of HOPE and never let me lose my positivity. Having friends and family who give me HOPE and encourage me is all I need. My friends remind me to keep the faith and never give up. They don't talk to me about the fact that this probably won't work (!7% chance). They don't tell me to be prepared if the news is bad. They know that I am keenly aware of these things. They do ask how I'm feeling, listen to me, cry with me, keep me positive and always give me HOPE. I guess that's the secret. Being surrounded by people who believe in God, believe in me and never let me feel alone.