A Letter To My Daughter

I still remember the moment I learned we were having a baby girl. A baby girl!!! Oh my gracious. I envisioned what she would look like. I began to see my little "mini-me". I could imagine her and her strong leadership skills. I began to envision her guiding others, standing up for what's right and also sharing God's word. Russell (my husband) and I started reading books on how to raise our daughter. When she was around six months old, I remember looking in the mirror and criticizing myself out loud. I was looking at my belly and my arms and stating how I "wished" they looked. It didn't seem to faze me at all as I spoke these words, but Russell gave me "the look" and I began to think about how what I was saying affected my daughter. After all, I constantly told her she was perfect. I would never dream of telling her anything else. She won't ever have to question her beauty. I would never speak to her about herself with anything but positivity. Well, here's what I've grown to realize over the last three years. My daughter looks up to me and the way I treat myself will teach her how to treat herself. She cares more about being like me than being told things by me. She's almost four now and she is constantly wanting to be like mommy. It's so flattering, but also carries a huge burden. Just the other day she saw me working out and came over and copied everything I did (or at least tried to). She loves to come in the kitchen and cook like mommy. She see's what I'm wearing and goes to her closet to get matching clothes. She wants to be just like me. My role as her mommy is to show her that I love ME so she will grow up and always love HER. What a beautiful gift to give her. A positive perception of the body, mind, spirit and life can change everything.

What I say to myself is important. My Dad taught me very early in life that "You become what you think about". Meaning, my perception becomes my reality. If I perceive my legs as "big" or "unattractive", guess what? I will project that out into the world. But what if I shifted how I feel, think and what I say to myself about my legs. What if I told myself my legs were strong and I love how they are able to carry my daughter wherever she needs to go. What if I turned my negative image of myself into a positive image. What difference could that make for me and those around me? It makes a huge difference. I actually caught my daughter in front of the mirror the other day and she told herself, "I love my belly and I love my arms". Why did she say that? Well, I'm pretty sure it's because that's what I say to myself. The truth is, my belly and my arms are far from perfect. I've had a c-section and my belly doesn't look at all like the models I see on magazines. My arms aren't chiseled and sleek and I've never "loved" them. I do however, love what my body does for me everyday and how strong it is. I've chosen to focus on finding my beauty, rather than my flaws. It all came together for me that day when I heard my daughter talk to herself in a positive way. I knew right then that when I stood in the mirror and shared positive thoughts and perceptions, she was watching. My daughter is watching my every move and this is teaching her who she will become, how she will view herself and also how she will view the world around her.

As a mommy, I have so much responsibility and my job never ends. With all the negativity I face and retouched photos I see, it's easy for me to get caught up in what I wish I had or to focus on my flaws. My daughter needs me to to show her a different way. She needs me to show her how to love herself. It's time for me to love myself and project that onto my daughter. I've learned to be intune and aware of what I'm saying and to turn my negative thoughts into positive ones. My reality has become one of hope and true beauty. What a different world my daughter sees because I chose to shift my perception. So, my fabulous friends, let's get out there and teach our daughters they are beautiful and they are enough. It will make all the difference.